More often, this moment is preceded by weeks or months during which everything might look perfectly normal on the outside. We work, take on new tasks, reply to messages, launch projects — and even show good results.
The paradox is that the beginning of this journey sometimes doesn't look like exhaustion at all.
On the contrary.
It can start with a very strong desire to do everything as well as possible.
«I have to manage. I have to do this well. Or even better — perfectly.»
It sounds like motivation. But if rest, your own needs, and the right to make a mistake gradually disappear behind this — it is already a signal to take a closer look at your condition.
When ambitions start working against us
A new project often begins with excitement.
You want to do more, show results, exceed expectations. Internal KPIs very quickly appear in your head:
- this project must be successful;
- the result must be noticed;
- I cannot let the team down;
- I need to do better than last time;
- if I'm going to do it — I must give it my all.
This is exactly where it is useful to separate high standards and self-worth.
The project might not work out. The hypothesis might not be confirmed. The result might turn out to be weaker than we planned.
This is information about a specific project — not a verdict on our competence.
One of the approaches that helps to change this perspective is moving from the "it must work out" position to the position of an experimenter.
|
Instead |
Try |
|
"I must do this perfectly" |
"I wonder what result we will get" |
|
"Mistake = failure" |
"Mistake = data for the next decision" |
|
"I must know the right answer" |
"I will test a hypothesis" |
|
"The result of the project shows how good of a specialist I am" |
"The result shows what worked and what needs to be changed" |
This is not about lowering the bar.
On the contrary: we can remain ambitious, responsible, and demanding of quality — but not put our own resources on the line with every new project.
"I'm just tired" or is it more?
Not every difficult Friday means burnout.
Sometimes we really are just tired.
It was a hard week, a lot of meetings, deadlines, urgent tasks. Colleagues are annoying, you don't want to reply to messages, and the only ambition for the evening is to close the laptop.
And that's normal.
One of the simplest indicators is what happens after rest.
Overload
After the weekend, sleep, a change of activity, or a normal pause, the following gradually return:
- energy;
- curiosity;
- concentration;
- desire to do something;
- normal reaction to people and work tasks.
Accumulated exhaustion
There seemed to be rest, but the feeling doesn't change.
The weekend is over — there is no more strength. The next weekend doesn't give a sense of recovery either. Tasks that were previously routine start requiring a disproportionate amount of energy.
And a very simple system gradually breaks down:
tension → recovery → tension → recovery.
We continue to add tension, but almost stop compensating for it with recovery.
Burnout doesn't always look like "I'm lying down and can't do anything"
There is another trap: we often look for symptoms that are too obvious.
In reality, a person can continue to work and remain functional.
- Tasks are completed.
- Attended the meeting.
- Sent the emails.
- Met the deadline.
But inside, the reason why all this is done gradually changes.
Not "I want to", but "I have to".
What can change gradually
Initially: "I want to do this project awesomely."
Later: "I have to try a bit harder."
Then: "I have to finish this, this, and this — then I'll rest."
And finally: "I don't want anything anymore, but I have to."
The first things to disappear are often those without a deadline.
A walk. Sports. Drawing. A book. A conversation with a friend. An evening with no "useful" goal.
We do not abandon ourselves in one big decision. More often, it happens through dozens of small ones: I'll skip today, no time right now, after the deadline, starting next week.
And if "I have to" has long taken up almost all the space, it's a good reason to stop before the body does it for us.
Mini check-up: 5 questions for yourself
This exercise does not take hours. You don't even need a separate evening for reflection.
It takes a few minutes and honest answers.
1. How much energy do I have right now from 0 to 10?
Not "how much there should be", but how much there actually is.
2. What took the most strength over the last week?
Try to be specific. Not just "work", but, for example: constant context switching, a specific project, a conflict, uncertainty, or endless calls.
3. What gives me energy right now?
People? Silence? Walks? Sports? Creativity? Or maybe you realize that right now you can't name anything. That is also an important answer.
4. When was the last time I truly recovered?
Not just had free time. But felt: I have both time and strength again.
5. What am I continuing to do just "on autopilot"?
Because I have to. Because I'm used to it. Because it's expected of me.
Quick indicator
If the answers sound something like: little energy + a lot of "have to" + nothing that fulfills + rest doesn't recover — the problem might no longer be just one hard workday.
Don't wait for obvious signals to appear
Gradual exhaustion is dangerous precisely because you can adapt to it.
Something that would have seemed abnormal a few months ago becomes the new normal.
- Constantly working in the evening? Normal.
- No energy for friends? Just a lot of tasks.
- Getting annoyed over trifles? A tough period.
- Don't want to open your inbox? Everyone gets tired sometimes.
And then isolation, apathy, or, conversely, intense irritability are added to this. And it is exactly in the later stages that it often becomes much harder to deal with your condition on your own.
Therefore, the key task is not to learn how to heroically get out of the maximum point of exhaustion.
It's better to learn to notice yourself on the way to it.
What you can do right now
You don't have to rebuild your whole life in one Monday.
Sometimes it's much more realistic to choose one action and treat it as an experiment.
For example:
- for three weeks, do not open work messages after a set time;
- bring back one activity that used to give you energy;
- leave at least one evening a week free from work tasks;
- track your energy level at the end of each day;
- pause before an automatic "yes" to a new task.
Not "now I'm going to live the right way forever."
But: "I will try this for three weeks and see what changes."
Such an experimental approach is one of the core ideas of working with your own condition: choose what resonates, try it, and observe the result.
Professional challenges do not end at the borders
The topic of burnout became part of an international meeting, joined by participants from Central Asia, Europe, and other regions — in particular from Tashkent, Astana, Riga, Tallinn, Spain, and other locations.
And for us, it is especially valuable that the conversation resonated with participants from different countries.
SkillsUp is expanding its professional community and gradually creating more points of intersection with the audience of Central Asia — through training, experience sharing, expert meetings, and future joint initiatives.
Not instead of what has already been created. But as the next step in the development of a community that is becoming broader.
Because sometimes it is enough to gather people from different cities and countries around one topic to see: the professional context may differ, but many of our challenges are surprisingly similar.
And it is precisely from such conversations that further collaboration often begins.